2004-11-16 - 12:57 a.m.

I believe my bmi is somewhere around 17.6

Not good enough. Today was a waste. I skipped my classes and b/ped all day. I'm such a waste, why did I do that?.. All I really wanted to do was sleep, but I wouldn't let myself.

My therapist should be back in town. I chickened out from asking her for another referral. I thought about it all day but I couldn't do it. It brought the reality back too much. The pills, the thought of telling my parents. Actually having to work to get better. The possibility of gaining weight.

I know it's what I should want.. I'm just not sure if I actually want it.

add water - stir