2005-02-25 - 11:29 p.m.

Psychiatrist appointment today. Upped the prozac again.

She said if this doesn't fix me she's sending me to a dietitian. she kept saying how she wanted me to eat enough but not overeat. Making me think that she thinks I'm a pig. Even after I told her that on my 3 b/p days i didn't eat more than 900 calories.

My insurance doesn't cover the psychiatrist. I can't tell my parents.. it's a big mess. I wonder how much longer I'll be able to afford it. And then what? Will I backslide into the hell I was living before? At least my mood is more stable now and I can sleep a bit easier, even if the meds do make me tired all the time.

I'm so tired of being this way, but I don't have the energy to change myself. As stupid and horrible as that sounds. I hate myself.

add water - stir