2005-03-04 - 3:16 p.m.

I had a really rough therapy appointment yesterday. I half admitted to being abused when I was little, but cut off the conversation before it went very far.. telling her I didn't want to talk about it anymore.

We spent most of the session talking about inpatient. Why she thinks I need it, why I'm scared of it, how I don't think I'm worthy of it. How my insurance probably won't cover it, how I don't want my parents to know. On and on and on. She doesn't think I can do this on my own.

I checked my insurance last night.. and the only way they'll pay for inpatient for bulimia is if I'm suicidal or it turns into anorexia. Anorexics have lots of options under the insurance though. Makes me feel worthless. They don't consider it needing intense care because not as many people die from bulimia.

Great.
Thanks.
Do I have to be the one to prove them wrong? I hope not.

add water - stir